In a word: self-pity. I’m probably not going to make a lot of friends here but, making friends is not my objective. I plan to shed some light on the role that personal responsibility plays in your success – or lack thereof.

Many women have complained that technology has become an “old boy’s club”. They are never invited to the golf outings and after-work-drinks where deals are made, they haven’t been given a key to the “executive washroom” and there’s a “glass ceiling” that hampers their every effort. As an expert who has worked in the industry for well over a decade, I can confirm that some, if not all, of these situations occur. Welcome to the real world where the chips are not always stacked in your favor or evenly. What ever happened to personal responsibility? Is there anyone out there who believes in this anymore? Hello…is this thing on?

It is high time that women working in any industry stop blaming someone and something else for unhappiness with their career and take personal responsibility for their current situation. There have been too many times to count, where I have been the “only” – the only woman, the only person of color, the only person under 40, the only, the only, the only. I have never let that stop me from achieving anything I’ve set my mind on. Nor will I ever. In fact, I have learned to use my “only” status to carve out a distinct advantage. Do you think the potential client remembers Bob #3 in the grey suit spouting business-speak or the knowledgeable woman who’s not afraid to have an opinion and engage in real conversation?

As the saying goes, “If you’re not part of the solution, then you’re part of the problem.” The same concept applies here. You didn’t get asked to attend the golf shindig? When you found out about the outing, did you ask to be invited? When it’s time for after work drinks, do you always beg off with complaints about having to tend to family issues? (Save the “but my family is important” email, please. You know what I mean.) Have you ever stopped to think that maybe there is no glass ceiling but, rather, in the words of Rebecca Shambaugh, a sticky floor?

It is absolutely impossible to be focused on building a successful career if you are dwelling on differences and perceived slights. Take that energy and use it to learn more about the vertical markets in your industry, take a class at a local college, acquire a new skill that will increase your income and market value or find ways to save or make your company money. Do something – anything – besides complain.

In corporations, sexism and racism are real. You won’t get an argument from me there. However, there are enough “isms” to grind the world to a smoldering halt without engaging in “selfism”. You have the key to the executive washroom in your pocket – use it.

However, most of the articles talking about those differences in customs often don’t talk about the differences in how time is considered and used. In business America, we live by the “dictatorship of the watch”: Not being on time for an appointment is considered rude – even though many people do it, out of lack of time management skills; diving right into business within minutes of meeting someone is customary; cramming as much as possible in as little time as possible is the norm. We tend to think that, since we do it this way, everyone does it too, and sometimes commit blunders and lose patience or business because of it.

The truth is that other cultures see time very differently, both socially and professionally. While Anglo-Saxon and most North-European cultures apprehend time the way we do, other areas of the world don’t. Here are some examples, both social and professionals:

* In some cultures, arriving to work within a half hour of your official beginning of the day is perfectly normal. No one expects everyone to be at the office at 9 am sharp.
* The appropriate time to arrive at a meeting also varies from culture to culture. For us, and most of Northern Europe, arriving at the appointed time is the norm. In other cultures, your arrival time depends on your place in the hierarchy – the higher the later.
* When to arrive at a social dinner is also dependent on the culture: In some areas of Switzerland, you are expected to be on time; in others, 15-20 minutes late is the appropriate thing to do. I have heard that, in some areas of Spain (but don’t have first experience of it), arriving an hour late is customary. If you arrive on time, you run the risk of catching your host in the middle of dinner preparations, or in the shower!
* How time is spent in a meeting also depends on where it is held. In the US, no one will be surprised or offended if, within a couple minutes of the start, everyone dives into business. In France, it is customary to talk for a few minutes about family or general news before diving in. In some areas of the Middle East and North Africa, don’t even think about talking business before spending at least an hour talking about family, weather and recent events.

The meaning of the words around time might also be different from culture to culture. As Americans, we find it normal to give or receive a deadline, and for the work to be accomplished by that deadline, and the words about time have specific meanings. This, again, is not the norm in all countries of the world. In some countries, especially African and South American ones, “tomorrow” often means “not today”, not necessarily “tomorrow.” You might get what you requested the next day, or a week later. Also, deadlines may be indicative, rather than set in stone. “I need this done by such date” may be heard as “I need this done around this date.”

Those differences have tended to diminish in the past 20 years or so, as business practices have homogenized. However, they have not entirely disappeared. If you go to another country, learning about local customs – but also the local relationship with time – before you go can make the difference between getting the deal or losing it (Case in point: In the 70’s, Americans lost many deals to the Europeans in the Middle East because they didn’t worry about making sure that their shoe soles were not visible to their interlocutor when sitting on cushions, and insisted on talking about the reason for their meeting within minutes of its start.) Similarly, not all people coming to work from abroad know how we tend to use and refer to time. Taking the time to understand the person’s use of time, and teaching them the local way, can make the difference between keeping or losing a gifted collaborator.

As a marketing & communications professional a lot of my time is spent analyzing and assessing communications – not only in the workplace, but in the way that entrepreneurs engage their prospects and clients. I study collateral materials, websites and listen to and make recommendations on elevator pitches, speeches, presentations, email and direct mail outreaches.

If you’re in business – whether you’re pursuing a fast-track career or are the CEO of your own firm – what you say and how you say it can mean the difference between distinguishing yourself ( and your company) in a very positive way, or falling flat on your face!
And since we are a very multicultural world, your messages and communications need to be honed for each particular audience you are seeking to engage and impress. There are many things you can do to boost your performance and get the kind of response you want, but the top three on my list are:

* Knowledge of your topic
* Sensitivity to your audience
* Passion in your presentation

Before I entered the working world I thought I was pretty good at interacting with different people in most conversations. Then I began to work, and learned many lessons about what NOT to say and how NOT to sound, by sticking my foot (or feet) in my mouth, but good!

The bottom line: it’s best to do what you need to, to avoid making a serious faux pas.

My first personal experience with international communications was when I worked in a textile firm that did business with Korea, Taiwan, Japan and India. I’ll always remember my boss patiently explaining certain rules of etiquette, that he felt helped pave the way to successful communications with our varied vendors. His attention to the way we approached our phone and telex communications paid off handsomely.

Yet, all my illusions of what I thought knew from that experience were shattered when our first au pair arrived from Denmark. It was only then that I began to realize how much we Americans use slang, expressions and colloquialisms, pardon the expression – up the whazzoo! Although most times our verbal mishaps actually left us laughing, as the years rolled by and my family culturally exchanged with other girls from Norway, Germany, Austria, Spain and Holland, my husband and I found that we had to really THINK about what we said, before we said it, because sometimes our casual expressions could actually cause hurt or distrust.

When it comes to being an entrepreneur marketing your business, the way you craft your message to the different demographic audiences you serve, will have a huge impact on how effective you are in engaging them. It doesn’t matter if you are trying to engage local clients, regional business associates or global partners, successful communications involves six simple things:

* The right Attitude
* Great Research
* The appropriate Message(s)
* The right Incentive
* Listening to feedback
* Tweaking

The right attitude involves the capacity to see common ground, instead of differences. Consider all the facts: race, religion, family or educational background of your respective market(s). The bottom line is that a friendly, inclusive approach will help to keep things moving forward.

If certain words, colors or visuals can be misconstrued, you need to know about them before you put together a campaign. The way you figure out which path to take, is by doing a bit of research. When you’re sure you’ve got all the fine points covered you can then craft the appropriate messages – messages that will engage, not offend.

When it comes to marketing – we need to be distinctive, to be clear about our firm’s offerings, expertise and benefits, using language that is compelling and meaningful to each particular audience. Incentives within a defined timeframe help persuade your prospects to act.

Listening to any feedback and tweaking your message, will help to keep you on target.

So whether you are a business owner or a career person considering embarking on an entrepreneurial path, in order to be successful great communication is key! More companies are realizing that a lot gets misinterpreted. Misinterpretations can be aggravating at best, and disastrous at the worst. If you don’t want to have a communications breakdown – like what usually happens in the old children’s game of “Telephone,” where the last person on the line spurts out an entirely different message than what was originally said, make sure you pay attention to all the details.

To keep your business running in the pink, give it a robust dose of great communications on all fronts, whether it’s PR, a voice mail, an ad campaign, a direct mail piece, your website, white papers or in a networking venue. Your success depends on it.

What is Podcasting? A podcast is simply an audio recording that can be listened to online, on your computer or on a player. Many times this service is used for Internet Radio. The term podcast has no relation to iPod. A podcast is an audio file in digital format known as MP3. You can listen to a podcast on your iPod, iRiver or any other MP3 player.

Why should you care about podcasting? A relevant and important question. This question should be approached by looking at your company’s marketing objectives. Who is the audience you are trying to reach? Is your audience other businesses or consumers? What demographics do they fall in? Before you make the decision to start a podcast think about how it fits into your message and your marketing mix. Podcasting like any other marketing you do needs to be done based on your goals.

Podcasting is still a relatively new technology and many people wonder who is really listening. The answer is everyone! More and more people find themselves using the Internet as a resource for information. Traditional media is not the only way to reach your audience. According to recent PEW Internet Study that was done in April of 2005 the podcasting market was estimated to be about 6 million with listenership doubling every three-four months. And trying to reach a market like this through traditional mediums like newspapers, magazines and radio is an expensive undertaking.

Branding, customer loyalty or public relations these are just a few reasons why companies large and small have begun podcasting. The Web is open to billions of people but when an individual is listening to your podcast they feel like you are talking to them. This begins to create a bond between your listener and your business. Not an easy thing to do in today’s fast paced world.

What does it cost to start a Podcast? That will depend on who you ask. There is the cost of a microphone for you to plug into your computer, possibly a cost for software (but some are free) and lastly the cost of your time. Time to plan and execute your podcast. Time to promote it! Follow the other rules of marketing and be consistent – if you are going to podcast, be sure to commit to a schedule.

1. Start by listening to other podcasts you can find them on iTunes, iPodder.org or podcastalley.com and search for topics you want to listen to. Subscribe to the Podcasting feeds and listen to how other people are getting their message out there.
2. Plan out your message and create a plan for reaching your goals.
3. Set aside time to learn how the software works and practice recording.
4. Begin publicizing your podcast to your list of contacts
5. Start submitting your podcast to directories like ipodder.com, digitalpodcast.com or podcastalley.com.

What are your marketing goals? Maybe podcasting is right for your business.

Like many battles throughout history, each one was eventually settled through negotiations. While we might think that the strong should conquer the weak, that attitude will not create a long-term solution. The goal is to keep your cool and composure and, at the same time, discover how both you and your “adversary” can walk away as winners. Negotiating is usually done when we try to get a better price. However, in general, negotiating is a process of finding equilibrium, a state of balance and peace, and of knowing that the negotiators have found a middle ground. It’s also in our best interest to be the person to begin the process. Why? It keeps us in control.

Ask yourself now, “How well do I negotiate problems with difficult people that I deal with at work?” You can answer this question by giving yourself a negotiation “IQ test.” Think of how some people press your “hot” buttons and why it affects you negatively. Now recall the times you were able to overcome that difficulty. What skills did you use to help you negotiate in a calm and professional manner?

The key is to keep a negotiation simple by working at it point-by-point. Let’s say a co-worker insists that you help him or her solve a problem that is not your responsibility. While you probably would want to tell the person to “go take a walk,” do the opposite. Here are some ways to do that:

* Ask the person to define the problem. Use open-ended questions, listen, take notes, and periodically repeat what the person has said. It will let him or her know that you are serious and sincere.
* Acknowledge the other person’s problem. While you might know for a fact that he or she is totally wrong, see beyond the person’s ignorance. Agreeing that someone has a real problem can be the first step of a negotiation.
* Share your experience. Tell the person that you have solved similar problems in the past, and explain how it was done. The goal here is to politely teach the person how to fix the problem and encourage him or her to go off and deal with it.
* Be patient. Yes, we’re all too busy to deal with jerks. However, what happens if they don’t go away? Patience is an investment. The more you put in, the greater your return. Be willing to walk away. If the other person is being totally stubborn and doesn’t understand or respect the efforts you are making, then you might be facing a “roadblock.” Be polite, and suggest speaking at another time.

Here’s an acronym to turn workplace struggles into negotiation success:
N – Never be the first one to talk; get the facts first.
E – Enthusiasm and Energy are critical. Avoid letting people wear you down.
G – Set some Goals for dealing with the new challenges. Perhaps set a time limit for the resolution or perhaps acknowledge that a supervisor will have to be made aware of the problem.
O – Ask Open-ended questions. You’ll get more information and will also learn a lot more.
T – Talk less, and listen more. Give a difficult person an opportunity to “vent,” as he or she “blows off steam.” Wait until the person is done, and then make the effort to remedy the situation.
I – Information is power. When you can honestly offer a solution immediately, do it. However, if you need to do some research, take the time to do it, and get back to the person as soon as possible.
A – Attitude is everything, so keep it positive. If someone is down in a pit, your plan should be to pull the person out, not fall in with that person.
T – Trust yourself. Keep remembering your talents and skills. Avoid letting the person make you feel inferior.
E – Exit and walk away if the situation gets worse instead of better. There’s a limit to what you can do. As long as you’ve dealt with the person in the most professional, friendly, and efficient manner, you’ve done your job.

Sometimes we are the ones who have created problems with other people and are too self-centered to acknowledge it. Here are some ideas to help monitor your actions:

* Maybe the person is right. When dealing with a difficult person, reframe what he or she says to you and see if you can put a positive spin on it. Maybe the person was criticizing your style of doing a project. Think back to the heart of the message – was there some constructive criticism in it?
* Edit your comments. Phrase what you say so that you put water on the fire instead of gasoline. This takes practice. Often, our first thought is to strike back.
* Disarm the situation. Help the other person see the situation as a mutual challenge and that you’re in it together. Work your hardest to stay under control. When you’re determined to stay calm, it gives the other person a good example to follow.

Remember, everyone has a voice and wants to be heard. Even the “creeps” in our lives deserve the opportunity to speak, be listened to, and encouraged to seek peace with you.

According to the US Department of Labor and the US Census Bureau, the buying power of ethno-cultural groups in the last decade has almost doubled, accelerating faster than the overall US buying power. The collective buying power of African-Americans, Asian-Americans, Latinos and American-Indians had reached $1.3 trillion since 2001. This is up from $647 billion in 1980, and it is projected to reach $4.5 trillion by 2015. This is a fantastic cultural diversity group contribution to the US economy.

Furthermore, African-American consumers currently have the most buying power or $571.1 billion of all minority groups. This represents two out of every three dollars spent by minorities. Of the 78 million baby boomers in the country, nine millions are African-Americans between 37 to 55 year olds. This group has 78% of high school graduates and 36% of this group members have a median income of $38.643.

Many diversity scholars believe that the significant cultural distinctions between people are culture. Culture, of course, refers to ways people live and interact together. Those distinctions are the universals that are common to all societies and all cultures. In fact, culture also encompasses value systems, traditions and beliefs, religion, language, national origin, occupation and social class, ethnicity and race.

Americans of different cultures and races are increasingly becoming comfortable with living together: According to recent statistics, 78 percent of African Americans, 61 percent of Latinos and 57 percent of whites said they prefer to live in a culturally and racially mixed neighborhood. Also, 58% of Americans support affirmative action because Americans in general accept the equitable principle that, for every wrong, there is a remedy. But at the same time, 37% percent believe that race relations and ethno- cultural relations will always be a problem in America. When it comes to marriage, 73% of all Americans approve of interracial marriages. However, in a 1958 Gallup poll, when the question was posed only to Caucasians, just four percent of them supported mixed marriages.

Cultural diversity expands the range of options open to everyone in America and elsewhere in the global society. Diversity of cultures is a vehicle for understanding, for cooperation and for development not only in terms of economic and material growth, but also in terms of achieving a more satisfactory intellectual, emotional, moral and spiritual existence of all Americans.

The process of globalization has created a rapid development of new information and communication technologies. That has facilitated favorable conditions for renewed relationship and on-going interaction among the cultures and the peoples of the world. Affirming that respect for the diversity of cultures, acceptance, dialogue and cooperation in a climate of mutual trust and understanding are among the best guarantees for cultural and ethnic harmony in America as well as for international peace and security.

Most organizations have realized that educating their workforce about cultural diversity is necessary and inevitable. Managers, supervisors, leaders and directors must also educate themselves competently and become role models for their employees. Through effective cultural diversity training they will develop a deeper understanding of and respect for the various cultures that made America what it is today.

1. Partner/partnering. As currently used, “partner,” and its gerund form “partnering,” tend to refer (vaguely) to a host of business relationships or forms of close collaboration. Why is partnering any closer than any other form of collaboration? It isn’t, necessarily, but the feeling we get by saying “we’re partnering together” – note the power of words, here — may make us feel stronger, linked to another in a more profound way, than by saying “we’re cooperating on…”

However, “partnering” does not mean that you have a partnership in the legal sense . . . and in fact, you probably want to avoid that implication. Legally, partners are people who participate in a venture with shared benefits and shared risks. Partners are (generally) each 100% personally liable for the debts of a business venture. That’s not what business owners are usually willing to take on when they think of “partnering.” When partnering, the parties are usually concerned with creating a mutual “upside” – such as putting together a seminar series or working for a mutual client. There really isn’t much of a downside.

See how confusing it all becomes? And when business is conducted informally, people make assumptions (for example, that when referring to “your partner,” even if the two of you are shareholders in a corporation, the two of you really are partners, with unlimited liability to provide). The solution: stay away from phrases like “my business partner”. Although awkward, try “my business colleague,” “business associate” or “co-owner.” Also, avoid “partnering.” You may be collaborating, cooperating, working together, have joined forces or have teamed up to work on a project. You might even have a strategic alliance…

2. Strategic Alliance. Like an iPod, strategic alliances have become the latest “thing to have” – at least insofar as building business relationships are concerned. But what does this term really mean? Used generally, many small business owners use it to refer loosely to a collaborative “bond” with another company. But there’s more involved in a real strategic alliance relationship.

A strategic alliance lies in the muddy area between a basic referral relationship (“I like you, so I’ll refer business your way”) and a joint venture (where a new company is formed with the two participants as the owners). By definition, a strategic alliance is “a coalition formed by two or more people (or entities) in the same or complementary businesses to gain long-term financial, operational, and marketing advantages without jeopardizing competitive independence.” A mouthful, yes. But note the implicit ongoing (“long-term”) obligations. Think of a marketing strategy firm that forms an alliance with a graphic design firm to attract a Fortune 1000 clientele. Once you move beyond a mere referral relationship, questions (and complications arise): is the relationship with each other exclusive? If not, what are the exclusions? Who will take the lead on the projects? Through whom will payments get funneled? Who “owns” the client? Small business owners are often so excited to say they have “alliances” in their stable, that they don’t consider the long-term issues that can harm the relationship if not addressed. The solution: if the alliance really is “strategic,” have it in writing so that both sides are clear about their expectations.

3. Agent: Another way that small business owners try to provide greater “value-added” to their clients is by referring them to the other service providers in their network. For example, Ingrid, an interior designer, referred her apartment-owning client to Oikos, Inc., a company that built custom-made furniture. Oikos delayed providing the client with the furniture and the client delayed making the final payments. Ingrid got caught in the middle. “I’m an agent for the client,” she worried. “What happens now?”

First, the mere act of making the introduction did not necessarily make Ingrid an agent of the client. The fact that the client signed an agreement with Oikos directly helped bolster that. But had Ingrid contracted with Oikos and been allowed to make those decisions, the situation would have been murkier. So, to flip the situation around, for those of you dealing with “Ingrids,” or middlemen, watch out! By definition, an agent has the power to bind a principal if she has (or appears to have) the authority to do so. So if you gave the green light to your technician/reseller to get a new computer system, you would be financially responsible for paying for it. And unless the decision made by the technician was way beyond the bounds of what you authorized (e.g., a $20,000 network when you only authorized a $2,000 desktop), the agent is not personally responsible for the decisions made. The solution: consider making your arrangements with the ultimate vendor directly, or give unambiguous, written instructions to “Ingrid” so that she’s clear about what you want.

4. Vested interest. Business owners distinguish their companies from the competition by promising better, more personalized, more caring, more responsive, more ["fill in the blank"] service (than the next guy or gal). I have come across websites, marketing materials, “mission statements” and the like where the business owner expresses her intent to provide stellar service by stating that ["Company] has a vested interest in your satisfaction.” I’m not going to quibble about the eminently fine objective. It’s the “vested interest” part that raises concern.

When you have a “vested interest” in something – a pension plan, for example – it indicates that you have the right to a legal share in the property, and that right exists now. Our eager service provider does not have any legal right to the company for which she may provide services. Nor does her goal of stellar service translate to any kind of legal right. Yes, it’s in the best interest of her company to ensure that she delivers stellar service, but that doesn’t make it “vested”. The solution: consider phrases like “It is the mission of XYZ Company to provide you with stellar service” or “it’s our goal” or “it’s in our interest to ensure your happiness”.

Is all of this nit-picky? Maybe. But in this era of relationships … that can sour easily and lead to lawsuits … isn’t it better to keep matters simple by avoiding the “word wranglers” altogether?

Dear Jill,

I’m dealing with a sensitive issue with my administrative assistant. She delivers high quality work, but often arrives a little late to the office. I haven’t said much, because it hasn’t created any real problems, and I don’t want to come across as heavy-handed. We come from two very different backgrounds and cultures, and I’m concerned that I might say the wrong thing. Do you have any thoughts on how I can address this?

Thanks,
Anne

Dear Anne,

Please know that you’re in good company—even the most experienced managers can find it challenging to deliver constructive feedback. It’s particularly important to focus on establishing good communication when diversity is involved, as there’s greater likelihood for misunderstanding. I would encourage you to speak with your assistant, and the following questions might help you to prepare:

Identify the behavior targeted for feedback:

* How would you accurately describe the specific behavior that requires feedback?(who, what, when, where)

Describe the effect this behavior has on you and others:

* When the above behavior occurs, what is the specific consequence for you? Others?

* Can you describe the effects of the above behavior in a way that informs and educates the receiver (trying not to blame)?

Identify your objective/desired outcome:

* What specific behavioral changes do you desire as a result of the feedback conversation?

* How can the relationship between you and the receiver be improved as a result of the feedback conversation? What specific interpersonal/relational changes are desired?

Develop your message:

* How can you begin your message in a way that prepares and opens the receiver to your feedback?

* What can you do during this discussion to ensure that when it ends, the receiver’s self-esteem will remain intact or even be raised?

After you’ve prepared, schedule time to meet with your assistant. Remember to provide positive feedback before the constructive. You might begin by sharing how pleased you are with the quality of her work, and the difference that her contribution makes. It would be best for her to leave your meeting feeling highly valued, and motivated to address the performance issue identified.

I also recommend a wonderful resource for managers on diversity-related issues, Workplace Diversity: A Manager’s Guide to Solving Problems and Turning Diversity into a Competitive Advantage by Katharine Esty, Richard Griffin, Marcie Schorr Hirsch.

Coaching Employee Development: Skills and Perspective

Hi Jill,

I’m a manager in a small company and one of my people is having problems with an employee in another group. He’s had difficulty getting information from her and seems to take it personally. I’ve coached him with some success, but he’s formed a grudge against this woman. Can you suggest how to deal with this? He’s has a lot of potential, and I want to help him to develop.

Thanks,
Marsha

Dear Marsha,

I want to commend you for focusing on your employee’s development, as well as his performance. It sounds like you’ve coached him to work more effectively with his associate. Now you can provide perspective to help him see things in the most beneficial light. Below is an excerpt from a model I developed to help clients deal positively with people-related challenges. You might find it helpful, as you continue to coach his development.

Leverage the development opportunity inherent in every people-related challenge you encounter…

* Try to envision challenging people as actors portraying very specific roles custom-designed to assist your professional and personal development. This perspective enables you to step out of the stress and unpleasantness of emotional negativity, and into a kind of “oasis of objectivity.” Seen as a beneficial growth opportunity, the difficult situation draws out your natural creativity and highest wisdom. Suddenly, you are at your very best in dealing with the challenging scenario.

* Maintain the perspective that no people-related challenge is too big or more than you can handle. Believe that you have what it takes to manage any situation in your path (keeping in mind that eventual outcomes may be different from your initial goals for situations). Remember also that no people-related challenge is ever too small for you, no matter how petty or trivial it may seem. Remain humble, and approach each new issue with as fresh and respectful a perspective as possible.

* Try to be compassionate with yourself as well as with others involved. (Any virtue you can bring to bear will most certainly serve you.) Remember that each of us has more to learn—that we are all very much “works in progress.”

Whether or not your employee is ready to release his grudge, he will most certainly benefit from your focus on his development. This kind of investment can go a long way!
If you have a question about a leadership or team issue in the workplace, please write to AskJill@womenandbiz.com.

It doesn’t necessarily matter what culture an individual stems from. Essentially, the message is that all people have opinions, dreams, and memories that govern how they respond to something at any given moment. Age, personal perceptions, and life experiences probably have more to do with emotional diversity than any other factor. Not a new concept, but one that is having more and more impact as the population ages. Baby boomers are being hit the hardest with nostalgic messages in ads and television commercials. Music and fashion labels from the 60’s, 70’s, and the 80’s are being re-invented by the younger generations and retro every thing is being reworked with a modern twist. There are even emotional intelligence certification programs available. The past is very much with us, but are the emotions and attitudes from these decades the same? Hardly.

Perceptions of image and the emotions that they invoke are very highly personalized and subject to mood. Put a mixed variety of people in a room, ask them to access each other based solely on first impressions, and you’ll most likely get a controversial and perhaps extreme description of each person that varies greatly based on such pre-conceived ideas of image, personality, race, sex, and personal preferences. If we are in an off mood, we respond to certain situations or stimuli in a negative way or if something simply reminds us of an unpleasant memory the response can be the same. Not everyone is going to feel the same way about the same thing at the same time and, knowing this, it really is impossible to please everyone. So how can such a broad reaching subject be translated into business success?

When planning a marketing strategy, considering how certain individuals or groups may respond to a message is a given, but being too general can be a mistake. Apart from the usual demographics, there are many niche markets popping up that are just begging to be catered to. Take, for instance, a growing number of 50-something women starting their lives and careers over again, childless-by-choice couples, the green movement, and so on. Anything considered renegade behavior is emotionally charged. You may be in the middle of a niche market in the making! Knowing how to recognize opportunity early is a valuable plus in any business. So is the knowing when to back away.

Ask yourself this question: What makes people buy a product or service? Is their motivation based on intellect or emotion? Need or want? Consider impulse buying and how retailers set up products right by the check out or how the new merchandise is always placed at the front of the store or department. There is also a strong emerging trend toward buying experiences over material goods, but the rule of thumb is that people will usually buy what they want over what they need. A good example of this is a couple owning a home with two expensive automobiles in the garage, a huge wide-screen TV along with all the latest household gadgets, but no health insurance or a woman owning a hundred pairs of shoes. In reality, however, the emotional basis for most people’s behavior is not a simple equation. It’s a bit more complex than that.

Advertising, in all its mediums, is usually geared to feeding on the populations’ insecurities. Lose weight, wear expensive clothes, have a big house, a glamorous career, etc. and life will be perfect. Emotional buttons get pushed and desire sets in. There are also large segments of individuals that, at the same time, are not influenced by these messages and some who are more logical than emotional in their choices. Being able to communicate with some or ideally all of these types of individuals, particularly at their level, means a more successful, and diverse, business with the ability to grow and evolve with the changing times.

In closing, an important observation to consider is a proven fact that people are more apt to be loyal to a product or service, not necessarily the best mind you, that consistently delivers the same level and quality of experience. The same thought goes for customer service. The most successful sales people deliver positive emotions to their clients along with the sales. Sometimes it’s not even that important what they’re buying. It’s the feeling they get that really counts and that keeps them coming back. Think about places that you frequent and the reasons why. What keeps you coming back for more? What positive feelings do you equate with the product or business? Ask clients what they want and they will more than likely say, first and foremost, a good experience. It’s worth your future success to give it to them.