Each of us wants to climb the ladder of success and eventually make it to the top. As you journey to that destination, there will be countless numbers of people who will serve as motivators and mentors. These are the people that truly deserve a sincere thank you. While you should always know where you are going, it is just as important to remember where you came from and how and who got you there.

I have incorporated a thank-you chain and use it often to thank everyone who has helped me along the way. It is a simple, efficient, and powerful way to follow up and remember those who have been your greatest support.

How to Create Your Personal Thank-You Chain

1. Working from present to past think about the chain of events and people who led you to your current job (business, profession, or a major client). Ask yourself the following questions:
   • How did I get my current job?
   • How did I get into this industry?
   • How did I meet my last two major clients?

2. Make a list of the people who helped you through referrals or in other ways.
3. Depending on your contacts preferred method of communication, write, call, or send an e-mail to thank them.

Now think of all the people connected to your primary contact and determine how they may have played a role in helping you.

People are often surprised by a thank you because they may not realize the part they played in the chain. You will find it enjoyable to tell them how it evolved and how their role led to your success.

I want to thank you for taking the time to read this article. I anticipate as you incorporate the thank you chain into your lifestyle, that you will in return have great networking success.

You Have to Take the Lead When Meeting New Prospects
Sometimes trying to connect with someone who communicates differently is like two ships passing in the night. We don’t understand them, and they don’t understand us.

To communicate effectively, you need to be the first one who is ready to alter the way you connect. Once I was in France and was trying to speak with a shopkeeper. I thought that if I spoke louder and more slowly in English, she would understand me. Of course, there was no way she could. The louder and more slowly I talked, the more frustrating it was for both of us. I needed to alter my style (talking at a regular volume in English) and try something else she could understand, such as pointing, gesturing, and smiling.

The frustration I felt before I altered my style is exactly the same feeling we have when we do not connect with a prospect or client. We may be in our own country and speaking the same language, yet our communication styles are so different that we have a hard time making a connection. We need to understand and adapt our style to communicate effectively. I am a bottom-line person. Often I see the big picture first and then find a way to go for it.

Think about how you like to give and get information. What is your preferred communication style? How has your boss, various co-workers, or even your spouse reacted to your style? Has more than one person said that you are clear, sometime confusing, too soft spoken or aggressive? If you have ever been frustrated trying to communicate something when the other person “just didn’t get it”, could it be something you are doing? Determining where you need to adapt requires discovering the other person’s style. Keep in mind, people won’t tell you their style. You have to learn by observation.

Recognizing Personality Types
In addition to being aware of your own communication style, a good business professional adjusts to other people’s style. Some people are more sensitive to the concerns and feeling of others; others are more bottom line or results-oriented. Still others are interested in and concerned with details and the way things work. Sometimes there is a combination of all.

There are ways to identify personality and temperamental categories that predict how people react and relate to each other. One personality style indicator used by many companies is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. I also use the DISC. profile, which explores behavioral issues. It is an effective tool for understanding personality traits and styles. However, most interactions won’t give you the luxury of such elaborate tests. Therefore, a shortcut is to be a careful listener and observe behaviors (mostly body language). Like anything else, this takes practice.

For example, I once walked into a corporate conference room and found myself giving three different presentations at the same time! I was there to present a training proposal to three top level executives in the company. Having met them all and through careful observation and listening, I knew each had a very different personality style. My main goal (besides selling my program) was to speak to their needs and convey the benefits to each one. Therefore, I needed to adjust my presentation to each one individually. As I spoke with each one, I switched the way I conveyed the information I was giving to match his or her personality. Here’s how I improved my sales presentation with those three very different personality types.

The head of human resources and training was amiable in her approach. I made a mental note of her comment about “getting everyone involved” and her obvious concern for all the employees. Clearly, I had to focus my presentation to her on the personal benefits for her employees. I made sure she felt that the time her employees spent in training would be worthwhile for their growth and development.

The chief financial officer, however, was interested in the return on investment he expected from my program. In addition, he wanted details and numbers. I decided to give him the same proposal that I had given to the head of human resources, however I had a specific outline for each module, with costs clearly defined. The more data I presented to him, the better!

The CEO told me he had only six minutes to hear me out. (I actually clocked how long he was in the room, and it was exactly six minutes!) All he wanted to know was, “What are my people going to learn?” and “How much will it cost?” I was prepared with the same presentation (in case he had questions), and I gave him only the executive summary: a brief, succinct paragraph followed by bullet points and the bottom line.

These were three very different people all wanting the same thing yet needing it delivered in three very different ways. To succeed, I had to read and relate to each person differently.

Later, after I had done several programs with this firm, each person told me separately how much he or she enjoyed our working relationship because, “we communicate in exactly the same way.” I smiled to myself, knowing that my extra work and effort to understand each personality type was well worth it!

Traits of Common Personality Types
(based on the DISC. personality indicator system)

Dominant:
Bottom line-oriented, competitive, direct
Makes decisions quickly
Best approach to use:

* Focus on the “what”
* Be efficient

Influencer:
Persuasive, animated, expressive, emotional
Enjoys helping others
Best approach to use:

* Focus on the “who”
* Be empathetic

Steady:
Patient, agreeable, amiable, quiet
Is very dependable
Best approach to use:

* Focus on the “how”
* Be supportive

Conscientious:
Compliant, cautious, accurate, analytical
Likes lots of details
Best approach to use:

* Focus on the “why”
* Be logical

Not a Chameleon
As a business professional, you have no control whether your prospects or clients will be a “Mother Teresa” or a “King Kong.” If you simply mimic the other person’s style you will come across as manipulative and insincere. My advice does not advocate constantly changing your personality. Rather, I’m recommending a positive, sincere, and proactive approach to understanding anyone’s feelings and traits. You want to appear empathetic not opportunistic. The dictionary definition of empathy is “the action or understanding, being aware of… the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another…” Therefore, to become empathetic, be aware of communication styles and personality types.

What can a company do, so that employees have a greater sense of customer care? One key secret is for you to value, support and care for your internal people. We must treat them with the utmost respect, courtesy and interest, so that they in turn present these attitudes to the people doing business with you. Remember, these are the people who are serving and speaking to your “paying clients” every day.

The people you have on board are the competitive measure of what separates you from the others. Here are a few things to remember when communicating with them:

* Make contact on every level. How often do you go down to the trenches and talk to your front line people? Find out how they are, and learn what issues concern them. Ask them for customers’ comments.
* Give your people a sense of ownership. This is empowerment. When people feel as if it’s their own company, they’ll work harder to provide better service. One way you can encourage them to work harder is with incentives built into the job. These can be rewards or cash bonuses. Remember, this applies to EVERYONE at your company. Often the sales people get the best incentives. However, the performance of the assistants and people in the accounting department impact the sales force, which in turn impacts the customer.
* Help them grow. Let your staff know that they have an opportunity to become better at what they do. Constantly be looking for ways to provide on-the-job training. Also, people grow when they feel that they are part of the decision-making process. For example, let them offer suggestions and new policy ideas. Remember, their suggestions may be a result of hundreds of conversations they have with customers. They could have information that would give you new ideas to increase business and save on costs.
* Everyone is a salesperson. While front line salespeople are normally in touch with the customers the most, it’s my suggestion that everyone think of themselves as a salesperson. They should see the company like a human body. When every part of the body is well, great things can be achieved. However, a small irritation in the foot can cause a champion runner to stumble and go crashing down. Make sure to give your entire company a “check up.”
* One way to keep these ideas in mind is to think of how C.L.I.E.N.T.s relate to your employees:

C–Concentrate on employee needs; this helps customer needs
L–Listen to what employees say, and what they don’t say
I–Invest in your people, and gain customer satisfaction
E–Excellence in everything
N–Nice people finish first; keep your people happy
T–Trust your front line by giving them care and power

Nurture everyone at your company, and greater customer care will be the fruit of your efforts.

Here are three ways that your appreciation of others can be dramatically improved:

Reach Out

A voice mail message I received recently confirmed the value of saying “thank you.” The lovely message was from the CEO of a company I work with who said, “I want to thank you and to compliment you on the work you’ve been doing for us, and want to share with you some of the flattering remarks several of our senior people have given you….” That message impacted my work life so much that I still have it on my answering machine. To make such a phone call takes only 30 seconds.

Make Gifts More Personal

One year, my Christmas “thank you” gift to many of my clients and business friends was a glass shaped “light bulb” filled with mints. It had “A world of thanks,” imprinted on it and included my name, phone number, and website address. That gift showed others my appreciation while serving to promote my business. It is also something that people will use–I have seen it proudly displayed on people’s desks. Those kinds of gifts have a long shelf life because they can be refilled.

The Pen is Still Mighty

I am so dedicated to having a “thank you” strategy that I have created a highly publicized technique called the “thank you chain.” Here’s an example of how it works: After a motivation program I conducted at a major company, I sent “thank you” notes to all the participants. It’s worth the effort because it is an excellent way to stand out from other training professionals. I wrote about what I learned from the training session, and wrote a few personal words, letting them know how nice it was to meet them. The chain continued when two people from that session who received my thank you notes referred me to other people in the company, who then booked me for three other sessions.

Think about the moments you have available in your day when you can write a few notes, or call people to let them know how you appreciate the help they’ve given you. It will become an essential part of your life, and you’ll see the rewards.

Since you have made it this far, I want to “thank you” for reading, and your comments and thoughts are welcome. Please drop me an email.

Like many battles throughout history, each one was eventually settled through negotiations. While we might think that the strong should conquer the weak, that attitude will not create a long-term solution. The goal is to keep your cool and composure and, at the same time, discover how both you and your “adversary” can walk away as winners. Negotiating is usually done when we try to get a better price. However, in general, negotiating is a process of finding equilibrium, a state of balance and peace, and of knowing that the negotiators have found a middle ground. It’s also in our best interest to be the person to begin the process. Why? It keeps us in control.

Ask yourself now, “How well do I negotiate problems with difficult people that I deal with at work?” You can answer this question by giving yourself a negotiation “IQ test.” Think of how some people press your “hot” buttons and why it affects you negatively. Now recall the times you were able to overcome that difficulty. What skills did you use to help you negotiate in a calm and professional manner?

The key is to keep a negotiation simple by working at it point-by-point. Let’s say a co-worker insists that you help him or her solve a problem that is not your responsibility. While you probably would want to tell the person to “go take a walk,” do the opposite. Here are some ways to do that:

* Ask the person to define the problem. Use open-ended questions, listen, take notes, and periodically repeat what the person has said. It will let him or her know that you are serious and sincere.
* Acknowledge the other person’s problem. While you might know for a fact that he or she is totally wrong, see beyond the person’s ignorance. Agreeing that someone has a real problem can be the first step of a negotiation.
* Share your experience. Tell the person that you have solved similar problems in the past, and explain how it was done. The goal here is to politely teach the person how to fix the problem and encourage him or her to go off and deal with it.
* Be patient. Yes, we’re all too busy to deal with jerks. However, what happens if they don’t go away? Patience is an investment. The more you put in, the greater your return. Be willing to walk away. If the other person is being totally stubborn and doesn’t understand or respect the efforts you are making, then you might be facing a “roadblock.” Be polite, and suggest speaking at another time.

Here’s an acronym to turn workplace struggles into negotiation success:
N – Never be the first one to talk; get the facts first.
E – Enthusiasm and Energy are critical. Avoid letting people wear you down.
G – Set some Goals for dealing with the new challenges. Perhaps set a time limit for the resolution or perhaps acknowledge that a supervisor will have to be made aware of the problem.
O – Ask Open-ended questions. You’ll get more information and will also learn a lot more.
T – Talk less, and listen more. Give a difficult person an opportunity to “vent,” as he or she “blows off steam.” Wait until the person is done, and then make the effort to remedy the situation.
I – Information is power. When you can honestly offer a solution immediately, do it. However, if you need to do some research, take the time to do it, and get back to the person as soon as possible.
A – Attitude is everything, so keep it positive. If someone is down in a pit, your plan should be to pull the person out, not fall in with that person.
T – Trust yourself. Keep remembering your talents and skills. Avoid letting the person make you feel inferior.
E – Exit and walk away if the situation gets worse instead of better. There’s a limit to what you can do. As long as you’ve dealt with the person in the most professional, friendly, and efficient manner, you’ve done your job.

Sometimes we are the ones who have created problems with other people and are too self-centered to acknowledge it. Here are some ideas to help monitor your actions:

* Maybe the person is right. When dealing with a difficult person, reframe what he or she says to you and see if you can put a positive spin on it. Maybe the person was criticizing your style of doing a project. Think back to the heart of the message – was there some constructive criticism in it?
* Edit your comments. Phrase what you say so that you put water on the fire instead of gasoline. This takes practice. Often, our first thought is to strike back.
* Disarm the situation. Help the other person see the situation as a mutual challenge and that you’re in it together. Work your hardest to stay under control. When you’re determined to stay calm, it gives the other person a good example to follow.

Remember, everyone has a voice and wants to be heard. Even the “creeps” in our lives deserve the opportunity to speak, be listened to, and encouraged to seek peace with you.

1. Smile
2. Look the person in the eye
3. Listen
4. Remember names
5. Be aware of body language
6. Be respectful of other people’s boundaries
7. Look for common interests
8. Give genuine complements

1. Smile.

A smile is the first step in building rapport. Remember to smile when you enter a room, a business meeting, and even when you answer the phone. I give people mirrors with the phrase printed on the case, “Can your smile be heard?” I tell them to put the mirror on their desk when they are talking on the phone in order to see their expression. And, yes, a smile can be heard. Remember also, when you’re talking with someone face to face, they become the mirror that reflects your expression. Your expression is the most important thing you wear. Smiling can raise your spirits and can even affect the way you sound. A smile can also disarm another. Use this powerful communication tool to your advantage.

2. Look the person in the eye.

Making good eye contact shows respect and interest. Have you ever been speaking with a person who was looking over your shoulder instead of at you? Did you feel like, “he doesn’t think I’m important,” or, “he’s not even listening to me?”

Once at a trade show, I was talking to a man who spent the whole five minutes of a conversation that he had initiated looking everywhere except at me. In fact, at one point, he saw someone he obviously wanted to speak with and in mid-sentence, he turned around and began speaking with the other person as if I had evaporated into thin air.

Eye contact is one of the strongest communication skills we can develop. It’s been said, and I believe it’s true, “the eyes are the windows of the soul.”

3. Listen with care.

One of the greatest compliments you can give another is to let him or her know you are listening to everything that is said. Find the hidden word in LISTEN using all the letters. The word is SILENT. That is what our internal voice must be to get the full impact of what others are saying. Remember that when you are networking with a new contact, it is like reading the paper. Let the person tell you the story so you can discover the “news you can use.” More people have literally talked themselves out of a job or a sale by talking instead of sitting back and actively listening. It takes real concentration to listen.

4. Remember names.

Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People says, “…a person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language…”

It pays to remember names. Here are three ways to sharpen your name memory skills.

1. Form an impression of the person’s appearance and embed it into your mind. Note height, stature, color of hair and eyes, facial expression, and any distinguishing physical features. Do not concentrate so much on dress, or even hairstyle. These may be different the next time you meet.

2. Repeat the person’s name after you meet and several times during the conversation. When you repeat their name two things happen-they are flattered and the name goes into your memory bank.

3. Make up a visual story about the person’s name. Associate the person’s name with something that will remind you of it. Use your imagination; build a mind picture; put the person into your visual story. The sillier the story, the easier it will be to remember. Here is an example of how to remember my name with a visual story.

My name is Andrea Nierenberg. Picture me in the Antarctic, dressed in white fur, clinging to the bow of a sinking ship, the “Andrea Doria” (Andrea) which is “near an iceberg” (Nier-en-berg). There you have a picture of me and my name, Andrea Nierenberg. Remember, the sillier the visual story, the easier it is to remember.

5. Be aware of your body language.

“What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

You can say a lot without ever opening your mouth. Research tells us perceptions are formed in three ways: Verbal makes up 7 percent, Non-verbal 38 percent, and Visual is 55 percent of our perception of others. Notice that body language makes up the biggest percentage. Make sure your body language communicates what you truly want to say.

B-Breathe deeply and consistently. This steadies your nerves and gives you a pleasant facial expression that says, “I’m glad to be speaking with you.”
O-Overtures can speak volumes. Nod to show encouragement and to show you are listening. Keep an open posture to show you are receptive.
D-Demeanor is the part of your personality demonstrated by body language. A blank stare, crossed arms, nervous gestures, all convey the opposite of what you want to communicate.
Y-”You” meaning the other person should be your main focus. Observe patterns of others and find a way to match styles to ease the interaction. For example, if you are sitting across the table from a person who is leaning in to create a closer connection, follow suit. Do not lean back; this says, “I’m not interested.”

6. Be respectful of other people’s boundaries.

The invisible boundaries around us define our personal space. It varies from culture to culture. Most Americans become uncomfortable if someone is closer than 18 inches. In some countries, standing as close as we do in the United States is considered too far apart. In other places, it is too close. People’s boundaries are not only an issue for travelers. America is a melting pot so you need to be aware of the diversity within our own country.

7. Look for common interests.

Ask open-ended questions and then listen to what others have to say. Develop your list of “get to know you questions” so that they are easy and automatic. Make sure they are phrased so they that cannot be answered with just one word. Or, at least have a follow up question ready. Some people you meet-you probably know the type-will take your questions quite literally. “Did you enjoy the speaker?” you ask, hoping to start a conversation. “Yes” is the answer you get, followed by silence. So, change your question to, “How did you find the speaker’s presentation?” You may still get, “Fine.” But then you can follow up with, “What did you particularly like about it?”

Once you establish your common interests, the conversation will flow, and you will easily find reasons to follow up and keep in touch.

8. Give genuine compliments.

When you listen to someone carefully, often they will mention something which they are proud of. Think for a moment and find a way to acknowledge the person’s achievement. Make a goal of finding at least one positive trait or characteristic in each person you meet that you can compliment. It may seem awkward at first, but soon it will become second nature.

As a general rule, most of us do not give out compliments as often as they might be deserved. We worry that we will come across as phony, or as if we are doing it because we want something. This is why it is so critical to be sincere and to give a compliment only when you mean it.

People do business with people. That is why your image is so important–it distinguishes you from the crowd. Each day at work you’re involved in activities where your image is put on the line. This could include making a presentation, calling a client, or having a business meal. Each step of the way requires you to check your mental attitude and make sure it matches your outward appearance.

Here are some image evaluation questions to ask yourself. Each question is followed with a suggestion:

1. Do I really come across as articulate, persuasive, and sure of myself?

There’s one easy way to prove your knowledge without appearing over-confident or arrogant. It’s done by asking other people good questions. It’s a win/win way of improving your image because when you ask questions, you are complimenting the other person. And when you ask well-crafted questions, others will realize that you know what you’re talking about.

2. What happens when I meet someone new?

We need to act as cheerful, personable, and friendly as possible. It’s not always easy. However, first impressions can be lasting impressions. One way to help first meetings with others is to observe people to discover their communication styles. If they like to be in charge of a conversation, then be prepared to do most of the listening. Or perhaps they’re introverted, so you’ll need to find ways to help them express themselves. A sure-fire technique is to greet people with a warm smile. A smile is a universal sign that gives a positive first impression.

3. How trustworthy do I appear?

Think about how important our reputation and our reliability are to our image. We all work so hard to build relationships both at work and in our personal life. Therefore, if we are not consistently trustworthy, this can ruin our image. Developing a reputation for integrity can take a long time. However, our image can be damaged in minutes with one careless act.

Always be working on what I call your I.C.–Image Collection. Throughout the day, imagine that a photograph was taken of you at each encounter you had with another person. At the end of the day, pretend you’re putting together a photo album of all the pictures. What do you have of yourself? Is it a collection of pictures of a happy, positive, and self-assured person? Or do you look like someone who is unsure and rough around the edges?

Your goal is to look like a diamond–firm, multi-faceted, valuable, and someone who gives off a radiant light. When you possess those attributes, you will have a priceless and profitable image.

When I’ve given presentations on customer service, many businesspeople who live by electronic communication have shared their strategies with me. Here are some of the best:

Voice Mail

Keep the message concise and detailed. Speak slowly when giving your name and telephone number. How many times have you replayed a message and became frustrated because you couldn’t understand it? As far as the details are concerned, instead of leaving a message such as, “Call me so we can prepare for the presentation,” say, “For the presentation this Monday, let’s decide on an exact location and time.”

Here’s a tip that can dramatically improve getting voice mail messages returned. When you leave a message, the last word to leave, after you say goodbye, should be the person’s name. This personalizes the message. It’s warmer and friendlier when someone picks up a message and hears, “…thanks, I’ll speak to you soon. Bye, Tom” (of course, that’s if the person you’re calling is named Tom).

While leaving a thorough message helps, your tone of voice could be even more important. People can hear a “smile” on the phone, and they certainly can hear your attitude. When you leave upbeat messages, it invites the recipient to call you back. One way to test this out is to leave yourself a voice mail. Play the messages back and critique yourself.

Also, take into account the length of your messages. When you have to leave a long message, say that up-front. The recipient will appreciate hearing the reason for your extended message. For example say, “I’m going out of the country for 10 days tomorrow, so please excuse this long message about our unfinished business.”

It’s been said that, “timing is everything.” Returning messages promptly can make or break a deal. Work towards returning every message you get within 24 hours. When people ask you to “call them back,” it could be that they’re considering another vendor, and want to give you a chance to counter the offer. People don’t always say why they’re leaving a message. It’s your job to respond to them promptly and find out.

Fax

A Gallup/Pitney Bowes poll revealed that 64 percent of Fortune 500 employees who now have email would still rather get a fax than an email message. The message for us is that we should make sure that we communicate using people’s “electronic preferences.” And since faxing is still a key part of doing business, here are a few things to remember:

For salespeople, a fax can be a great tool to use for following up a phone call. Often, a voice mail or email can be easily erased, a fax is a perfect paper back up to make sure that messages have been received.

Faxes can also be a deal “sealer.” After you have completed a negotiation, you might want to get something in the customer’s hands that confirms your agreement. It doesn’t have to be the final contract. Rather, it could be a note that is hand written which says, “Thanks for the order. We look forward to delivering 15 units for $50 each, plus shipping. In the meantime, call me when you need something else.”

Email

While email provides almost instant electronic communication, it’s important that we take the time to use it effectively.

Many times we use email to replace what would have been a note, memo, or letter. In using email, make sure it looks professional. For example, what you send might be printed out and be distributed to other people. Therefore, when it’s a memo, make sure it looks like a memo. Also, carefully check the grammar and spelling. Many word processing programs help us “clean up” our copy. That’s not always the case with email. The correct punctuation and salutation should be remembered.

One thing that’s sure to be remembered, is having the “wrong” people see what you sent. We’ve heard the horror stories, in which confidential messages inadvertently found their way into everyone’s email in-box. Therefore, you might need to avoid including sensitive information in an email.

Finally, make sure you add at the end of every message your full name, title, email, phone and fax numbers. Sometimes the only way people know where it’s from is by looking at your email address. If it’s “09095QWE@aol.com, chances are they may not know it’s from you.

Since email usage is only going to increase, now is the time to get in the habit of using email etiquette.

Cell Phones

It seems that there was a time when the only people who needed cell phones were doctors and undertakers. Now, cell phones are a requirement for many salespeople, especially those who are often “on the road.” Regardless of how you might use yours, there are some basic rules to keep in mind.

Since cell phones can go everywhere, be sensitive to your environment when you call people. For example, be careful not to stand near a noisy place such as a construction site. Also, be considerate of those around you. Recently I was in a library and someone was loudly chatting away on his phone, while people were trying to concentrate.

Another “call to courtesy” is when you meet with a client in a place away from the office. A restaurant, for example, allows you to get away from the distractions of an office. Therefore, unless you’re expecting an emergency call, shut the cell phone off. Your clients will appreciate it if you’re not taking calls with food in your mouth.

Your clients will also appreciate it if you refrain from talking to them on your phone while you’re driving. This is because you’re unable to give them your full attention. People can sense when we’re not completely listening. Remember, it’s better to stop the car and then call clients. The conversation will be focused, and you’ll be able to communicate more successfully.

All of our electronic “tools” can never take the place of direct interpersonal communication. Take a look at your client list and think about all the numbers you have to reach them. Remember, there are people behind those digits who want to connect with you. Whatever “tool” you use, make sure it will get the job done with grace and style.

Yet you can celebrate the New Year while making a personal connection with other people that can lead to professional opportunities. Overall, no matter where you meet people, it’s important to think beyond yourself: sincerely meet people’s needs, nurture relationships, continuously be on the lookout to be a resource, and listen to learn from everyone you meet.

I’ve created an easy way to remember useful tips from the word NEW YEAR for fruitful networking:

N- Start the New Year off with a spark by remembering people’s Names. Here are a few ways to do that:

* Form an impression of the person’s appearance and embed it into your mind. Note height, stature, color of hair and eyes, facial expression, and any distinguishing physical features.
* Repeat the person’s name after you meet and several times during the conversation. When you repeat the name, two things happen-the person is flattered, and the name goes into your memory bank.
* Make up a visual story about the person’s name. Associate the person’s name with something that will remind you of it. Use your imagination and build a mind picture. Put the person into your visual story. The sillier the story, the easier it will be to remember.

E- Show concern and interest for others by being Empathetic. Empathetic people pay attention to details: they observe and interpret body language and listen carefully to what other people say. They pay attention to what is left unsaid and have the ability to read between the lines. They also know how to respect people’s boundaries and have the ability to make others truly feel they are listening and valuing them.

W- Wear something that makes you feel comfortable. If you feel relaxed, you will not feel self-conscious when you speak with people. Try putting on an outfit the day before the party and ask yourself how you will feel wearing it when you meet people. If your clothes or shoes are too tight, or if your outfit is too casual, think honestly about whether you will feel good at the party and what kind of image you will present to others.

Y- Focus on the “You” in each person you meet and find ways to connect and agree so that you’ll be saying “yes”. An easy way to do this is to make other people the center of conversation by asking them about themselves. Develop your own set of “get to know you” and appropriate business-related questions. Also, say something complimentary about others, since everyone likes to get a sincere compliment.

E- Speak with Enthusiasm in your voice. Enthusiasm is contagious; if you are enthusiastic, you bring it out in others. It makes communication easier and puts people at ease, so they are receptive to you. Realize, though, that a person does not have to be loud and excited to be enthusiastic; it can be a quiet passion that shines, making people want to be a part of it.

A- Make sure you go to the party with the right Attitude – to have fun, meet and connect with people, and listen and learn. This is part of making networking a part of your everyday life: every time you meet someone new, it is an opportunity to learn new things that will enrich and enhance your life. There is no magic formula to networking. All it takes is a positive attitude about building relationships and a willingness to learn and practice effective techniques.

R- Do some Research before you go, so you’ll know a bit about the people there and their professions. The Internet is an excellent research tool for networking more effectively. Before you attend the party, research the company or organization of any of the guests you may know. To better manage the information, look first for the most current material. You can find lots of articles and news items about promotions, job changes, and other news events that present opportunities for you to start a conversation with someone. If you spend some time doing research, you can also easily develop “opening lines” with other people you meet based on your new knowledge.

Finally, wherever you go to ring in the New Year, it’s important to watch your reputation and maintain your credibility. When you attend a party, remember to avoid running around frantically or feeling pressured to make as many contacts as possible. We need patience and have to slowly build our networks; it takes time. Networking is an ongoing process of creating connections and nurturing relationships that benefit everyone involved. You can start this process anywhere, and celebrating the New Year is a good time to do it.

“The opposite of networking is not working”—you can learn from everyone you meet and also be a resource to them. If you are lucky, down the road something may come back.

1. Is networking just about finding customers and growing one’s business?
Networking is all about developing and building relationships first. When this happens with hard work and sincerity, customers will come. It’s like a garden. When you meet new people for the first time, it’s like planting a seed. When you stay in touch by meeting for coffee or sending a holiday card, it’s like watering the seeds. Finally when there is a genuine reason for you to have a closer working relationship or friendship, it’s like the harvest. Remember we can plant and we can water—however the growth is a natural and organic process. You cannot rush it. One needs to think win/win and patience. I look at each connection I make as how I can help or refer that person. The biggest joy is when I put someone in touch with someone else and they do business together. Three of my major corporate clients took over three years to develop-lots of staying in touch, patience and finally an opportunity to work on an assignment. Each has turned into multiple referrals within the organization. The goal is stay in front of people, to be on their radar screen as a thank you. I do this with my electronic tips of the month, my quarterly newsletter and a variety of articles.

2. What has been the biggest “negative” that I have heard about networking?
The top complaint that came from a national survey that my company did was about people who act like they are trying to sell you something-right when they meet you. They pounce on you and tell you only about themselves and don’t have any interest in you. Another complaint is about people who lose interest if they don’t think you can help them—the people who figure they only need to “network” when they NEED a job or business. The key is always to give first. Be a resource-go through your database and think how you can help the other person. Every day, get in touch with three people just to say hello. I do this systematically. It could be as simple as sending an article including a note saying “I haven’t spoken to you in a while, and thought you might be interested in this.” Or let them know about an event they might enjoy, or congratulate them on a recent accomplishment. Keep it sincere, short and make it about them—not about you.

3. Is networking costly in terms of time?
Networking the way I look at it, is part of everyday life. Think of your current business or company—how can you connect with each person, vendor, or client and then plant seeds so that you get referrals. Ask questions, show interest and ask about things that are of interest to them. The “time” that you invest will be paid back many times over as you are developing and building relationships. Think of the associations you belong to and make the time that you go to these meetings and functions work for you. Get involved: work on committees and meet and develop new contacts throughout the year.

4. What are some things you can do to become more visible in your community?
Offer to speak at a local organization meeting. You might also offer to do a free mini seminar on your specialty in business. Write articles and publish your own newsletter, which you will send to your master file and also to a prospect list and database that you continually are developing and building. On the market, there are many pre-produced marketing pieces that can be created and customized with your name and contact information. Just be sure to always sign it yourself and if possible add something personal. For me, the newsletter is a “piece of gold”. I send out 2,500 copies quarterly and I always personalize each one—it can be as simple as: “Hi, Lisa, hope you’re great! Andrea.”

5. What are the five great keys to building your business through networking?

* Meet people and nurture your current network.
* Listen and learn from everyone you meet. We learn more by listening then talking, which is why we have two ears and one mouth. Also—we can learn from those we do not like—we learn how not to be. When you listen—you also learn what people need and how to be a resource and give to them.
* Make connections for others—find ways to connect other people together. I say 1+1=3. People will remember who made the original connection.
* Follow up—this is critical and the one thing most people forget to do. Under promise and over deliver. Do what you say and do it in a timely fashion. A wonderful quote I live by: “Give without remembering, and receive without forgetting.”
* Find creative ways to follow up— There is always an opportunity to stay on people’s radar screen with an article, note, something of interest to them—even remembering their birthday.

Remember this:

N Remember people’s Names and Nurture your Network
E Have good Eye contact, Empathy and know when to Exit
T Talk less, listen more—think, Trust, and Timing is everything
W Write personal notes to people and remember this is Work!
O Every time you meet someone is an Opportunity to learn and be Organized
R Reputation, Relationships, Reflection, Rapport, Results
K Knowledge is power with execution, Kindness pays!
I Be Interested in others, Integrity is key, take the Initiative
N Sometimes you have to say No
G Goals, Gratitude, be Generous with your time